Echoes

I wake up and through squinted eyes and a bourbon hangover I see a yellowish gauze coming from the window...it is a reminder...I am alive...in a world...and somewhere in this vastness so are you.

A clock ticks silent seconds and I try to remember what time feels like when I am with you...a racing entity, speeding moments and feelings, unable to catch my breath, hurtling down stairs and inclines, I pray I could cement these moments, carve them on a tree, cutting bark to permanently imprint these frames of my memory...and I fail.  I fail to do anything but to catch a few exquisite moments that flashbulb in my mind before vanishing into tiny dots...

I want you to be a bruise so at least I can touch it, tap it and feel the feeling again...it wouldn't be pain, this bruise of you, but remembrance...a raw, rare sense on my skin...it might hurt to push but it would connect my skin to my brain and back to my heart and the colors would remind me of the marks you have made upon me.

Cotton candy memories spooled out of confectionary sugars, a taste of a stolen kiss, a glance, a stare...compiling these sweeteners on a stick to walk around the fairgrounds of my life.  Sticky, sweet, a quick sucking of my fingers to remind me of the remnants of a place...a time.

I sit in traffic, a thousand taillights...time is a straight line in a lane ahead...seemingly endless...I realize just how fleeting our time is and how there is not stopping...no stop and go...but rather a fluid drift like a river after a rain...a gentle nudging against the earth, a flow that is unstoppable, unrestrained...a calming of alighting upon the earth, the topography and easily floating along top, no obstacles, a trust we are heading to a place together...so very different than when sitting in my car going nowhere.

I hear a song and want to share it...I see a flower and want to grow it...water it and care for it until there is a time when it can be plucked from its darkened earth and in its most beautiful state be pressed into your hand...for you to enjoy, even if only briefly.

We are a flower at its fullest.  We are in a jar on a table emitting colors, vibrant and provocative.  We can be seen from across the room.  And thus we stay...we never wilt or wallow.  Rather, we are this snippet.  This beauty surrounded by the ordinary...

I wake up, with squinted eyes and blink against the gauze of yellow light coming in...and in my mind I hear the echoes of the colors and the flavors and the noises of you.